The Swamp-Ass Level Humidity Continues…

I would have likely blown off this heat (currently mid-90s) back when I lived in San Diego in my 20s. Granted, I was a lot thinner (and younger), so that may have had a little to do with it, but the humidity there was always practically nil.  I mean, I lived there for eight months, and it rained for five minutes – and I drove through that!  I remember looking at my windshield and thinking, “Well, this is different… oh, it’s done.”

The point being, at one time in my life, I didn’t mind heat quite so much, but I have always hated humidity.

I’m not sure how well this applies to the ladies, but gentlemen have always appreciated being able to come home to a place of peace and rest at the end of their work days.  This is the same for me – I’ve always thought of my home as a haven, a safe harbor, if you will.  It should be a place where I can relax, be in my element, and let the worries and cares of the day loosen their grasp on me until they’ve fallen away from me altogether.

Unfortunately for my current situation, my “element” is not the jungle.  “Swamp-Ass”, or R.B.B.C. as we called it in the Navy (River-Bed Butt Crack), is not a welcome visitor in my home.  And though opening a window and putting a small fan therein was sufficient to battle the heat of last September (when I first arrived in NYC), I don’t think it will get me through many of these sweltering 90-plus degrees days.

So, I’m putting it out there in the Universe – kind of like a spiritual telethon aimed at the God who runs it.  My birthday is coming up next week, and it would really be super if you (God, not you the readers) could somehow send me the money necessary to get a nice A/C window unit so I don’t end up drenching my pillows in sweat at night.  Also, it would be much easier to work out in an air-conditioned environment, and in my current sedentary state, I’m going to need to start in one before I progress elsewhere.  Neither you nor I can see me working out for very long (jogging or even walking) in this kind of weather.  Also, I’m pretty sure I’ve outgrown all my shorts.  XP

But let’s just start with the A/C, God.  That would be really awesome, and I don’t often ask for much.  You should know.  Also, I dropped some hints with my mom about having my kids write to me for my birthday (as they’ve had my address for a while and have yet to use it) – if you could remind her of that, that would be swell.

And as a telethon bonus, dear readers, I’ll let you know when/if and how this particular spiritual request came about.  So keep reading, as I’ll post that next week on (or around) my birthday.  🙂

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About Emperor Lu Bu

The Emperor of Xeresgate - if you wish to know more, read my words.
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4 Responses to The Swamp-Ass Level Humidity Continues…

  1. lala1966 says:

    So you are a Gemini Too

    • Yes, and I must say – there’s been an increasing astrological trend around these parts. It seems I get that “Gemini” question now every time I tell someone my birthday is coming up.

      What annoys me is the statement that follows it 50% of the time: “Mmmm – I knew it. I could tell.”

      Half the time I feel like slapping the person for thinking my personality can be summed up in a word as simple as “duplicitous”, and the other half of the time I feel like asking, “Really, Nostradamus? Then what are tomorrow’s lottery numbers?” XP

      ^ If the above seems crankier than usual, keep in mind that I am currently hot and sweaty – and not from any scheduled workout, either.

      • lala1966 says:

        I understand. I spent about two and a half hours at the dentist office getting a tooth pulled today and the air was broken. Talk about cranky! Plus, it is my birthday today. That is why I thought about you being a Gemini. I had a feeling you wouldn’t like that lol

      • It’s not so much the “being” something, as it is the fact that people think it necessarily means you are something else.

        Anyway, happy birthday to you. Tough luck about the dentist.

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