“Xeresgate: The Castle Within” IS FINALLY AVAILABLE!!!

This is it, my faithful readers and fans… the very beginning of the beautiful, awesome, peerless journey into the world of Xeresgate!

It’s been seemingly countless hours of getting the formats just rightly and getting the cover just how I wanted it, but I finally have a finished product that I am proud of… so much so that I can’t even WAIT the 5-7 business days before it goes live on Amazon.com to offer it to you all!!

This is the cover (in case you’re wondering)…

The most awesome book you'll read all year... until the sequel comes out.  ^_^

The most awesome book you’ll read all year… until the sequel comes out. ^_^

This is my Magnum Opus, folks.  I am not exaggerating when I say it’s the best thing I’ve read since Shakespeare and Tolkien!

But don’t take MY word for it!  “Look Inside” at the first link (for the Kindle eBook version) and see for yourself!

Link to the Kindle eBook version – available immediately on your Kindle!

Link to the trade Paperback version – will need to be mailed, but comes with visual examples of the Taijitic Seal and the Flag of Xeresgate that is not seen on the Kindle cover!

Whether you want something to snuggle into bed with, read on the subway or bus on the way to work, or just something to read in-between Dagorhir battles – THIS IS THE BOOK FOR YOU!

People have asked me what it’s about (that don’t have the luxury of reading the summary links above like YOU all do), and I tell them that it’s just easier to say what it ISN’T about!  And it’s really true.  But just in case you guys think I’m messing with you on that point, feel free to browse the Tags below this post… EVERYTHING in those Tags can be found in the book.  Trust me; YOU’LL LOVE IT!!

Once you’ve gotten a copy, be sure to stop back by here and leave a comment saying what you enjoyed about it, what interested you, or just what stood out the most!  I’d sincerely like to know.

As always, THANKS FOR READING!

UPDATE:  Below are just the Tags relating to the first 15 chapters.  My hands are about to fall off from typing, but I’ll make you all a deal – for every 15 books sold, I’ll put up the tags for the next 15 chapters.  (So yeah… I wasn’t kidding when I said it was easier to say what ISN’T in the book!)

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Posted in Published Works, Update | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 18 Comments

Happy Dragons Day! (II)

Unable to find origin to give proper credit - if you made this, let me know!

Happy Dragons Day!

Yes, it is the fourth annual Dragons Day (and the second time it’s been mentioned in Show Me, thus the above title), folks!  (If you missed the first one, you may read it here.)  This is the day that every red-blooded Man sets aside to evaluate whether or not his Lady has become a bitch or not.  If she has, then she is sacrificed (metaphorically, you clods) to the nearest Dragon and replaced with a Lady more suited to the task of being your #2.  And for those men of you that are still living with a bitch, your local Dragon has your number, and will be calling to re-instruct you in the ways of Manliness until you grow a pair and kick her ass to the curb where it belongs!

To keep with tradition, here is another Dragons Day list – bitches versus Dragons…

———

10 reasons Dragons are better than bitches

1.  Bitches breathe metaphorical fire; Dragons breath actual fire.
2.  Bitches protect hordes of their bitch friends; Dragons protect hoards of treasure.
3.  Bitches steal your drugs to get high; Dragons get high with their wings.
4.  Bitches want to move into your place; Dragons have their own cave.
5.  Bitches give infrequent, terrible advice; Dragons offer wise insights anytime.
6.  Bitches are loud for no damn reason; Dragons are loud when they’re destroying cities.
7.  Bitches are always cheaters; Dragons are always faithful.
8.  Bitches age quickly and horribly; Dragons look badass at any age.
9.  Bitches lie to tell everyone how great they are; A Dragon’s worth is self-evident.
10.  Bitches avoid arguments they can’t win merely by bitching; Dragons will fight for their convictions to the death.

———

Do you have any pictures of you in Dragon armor, drinking from a Dragon mug, or have any Dragon sketches/artwork/videos that you’d like to share?  Well, today’s your day!  Leave them in the comments!

Happy Dragons Day, everybody!!

Posted in Comedic | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Fuck Natalie Morales!

You all know that I don’t normally do current events specifically, but rather point to the generally terrible societal zeitgeist instead.  Also, I don’t generally watch the news (unless I’m in a weird mood and The Daily Show or The Colbert Report is clogging up my free Hulu queue) because it’s all bad anyway, so why bother?  I don’t need media of any type telling me what to fear, love, and respect!

And the bullshit Natalie Morales pulled today (coincidentally, on Today) was no different.

Let me begin by saying I don’t normally even turn on the cable box.  While staying where I am (for now), it’s their cable box, not mine.  But my finger got lazy this morning and went for the button on the remote that turned everything on at once, so I had to wait until it was done that cycle before I could turn the cable off again.  To make a long story short, they had Elizabeth Banks on to talk about the new movie with LEGOs, and I thought, “Oh cool!  LEGOs!  I remember them!” and went ahead and turned the sound system to the TV on (Yes – it’s separate.  I’m living with people with money.).

I wish I hadn’t.

It wasn’t even two minutes after they played the trailer for the movie that Al Roker was being his trademark “neutered Beta” self talking about how it wasn’t a hero or a princess movie, but how they were all equal.  (Barf.)  And then Elizabeth Banks starts talking about how her character (That no one in any decent cartoon or comic book community has ever even HEARD OF before!  Seriously… who the fuck is “Lucy”?!?) is so cool and how her boyfriend (as if he’s her accessory, and not vice-versa) is Batman, and he’s Narcissistic.

First of all, fuck your character.  Lucy is some emo-looking bitch who adopts her entire look and feel from a comic HERO that has been laying it down for decades.  Fuck you, Lucy, you sycophant… you nothing!  Second of all, Elizabeth, Batman is Narcissistic?  Well WOULDN’T YOU BE?!?  Imagine (if your tiny brain can conceive of it, Elizabeth) that you are the Caped Crusader… you’re a fucking millionaire playboy philanthropist by day, and by night you protect an entire metropolis that has the indicative urban sprawl of modern-day New York City!  All that… by yourself.  Just you.

If you were Batman, you’d look yourself in the mirror and proclaim yourself king of the fuckin’ world, you condescending, deluded bitch!

But (believe it or not), that’s not even the straw that broke the camel’s back for me.  It was that flippant little feminist moron Natalie Morales that did it.  (And she’s not exactly popular… I had to Google search several different kinds of “female host of Today show” before I ran across her picture in one of the many articles from last year proclaiming how the Today show was going down in flames, was shitty, and was no longer worth watching.  [Considering I only watched for about five minutes before deciding the same, I’d have to whole-heartedly concur.])

After Banks figured she was good enough to put down Batman, that little dimwit Morales chimed in with, “You put him in his place, huh?”  WHAT… THE FUCK, you idiotic jackass!!  Put him in his PLACE?!?  You feminist fuck-face!  That little eunuch Al Roker just ceded ground to be “equal” with you, but you still thought enough of your worthless opinion that you were going to imply that a SUPERHERO MAN’s place was beneath that of some walk-on, gender-quota BITCH‘s place??

You see what these asshole bitches in the mainstream media are trying to do?  They’re no longer even hiding the fact that they think women are not only equal to but superior to men!  Bitch, FUCK YOU.

Name for me the world-renowned buildings that a woman has been the head engineer, chief architect, or construction foreman on.  Same thing for bridges, monuments, tunnels, highways, railways, or ports.  Don’t worry; I’ll wait.

While you’re at it, go ahead and name me every woman that’s ever written plays, poems, literature, or music that has stood the test of time or been non-ironically called a “classic”.

Then, once you’re done with your list of nothing, name me all the women that have pioneered (been the first and most successful in) flight, sea/land/space exploration, invention, and medicine.

Bitches, you stand on the shoulders of GIANTS.  And the day is coming – very soon – when Papa State will not be able to take care of you anymore, and guess what?  The men that used to take care of you… the ones you’ve been denigrating for decades to make yourselves look better, the ones whose throats you’ve been forcing down shit while telling them it was candy, the ones you’ve counted as worthless accessories to your bloated, self-important, princess complex-having lives… they will rise as one and leave you on the GARBAGE PILE where you belong!

I only hope that there still remain some Ladies for the Men of that day, because if every bitch on Earth fell at once, I doubt 10% of the female population would remain.

Posted in Agnostically Biblical, Celebrity, Rant | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 19 Comments

The Final Countdown

I don’t want to put too much emphasis on it (in case I [or circumstances] end up disappointing me again), but my novel… my magnum opus, if you will… is on a do-or-die schedule to be completed and available for purchase by the end of this month.  I can’t go into the specifics of why it’s “do-or-die” without burning some personal bridges, but let’s just say that hopefully my autobiographical timeline later reads: “March, 2014 – The Emperor was never indigent (or anything less than self-sufficient) again.”  Also, I apologize to any “Europe” fans who came here thinking this post had anything to do with them.

The reason I’ve been rather quiet on the blog front this year is that I’ve been doggedly focused on completing this work, which will not only beat the first Harry Potter for word-count (at least 80,000 words), but will be ridiculously better written.  Also, while J.R.R. Tolkien was a renowned polyglot (and also a bit better writer than myself), I have not allowed my personal aperture to ever close to laser-like focus.  So while he was a polymath (for languages – as I said previously, polyglot), I am more of a dilettante.  My foci have never been satisfied with just one area of stimulation and corresponding discourse.  It is in that regard (and only in that regard) that I have excelled the honorable Mr. Tolkien.

My book (thus far – as it’s not done yet, there will most likely be more) addresses: the lottery, the IRS, castle construction, Minecraft, all different kinds of magic, spirit keeping, racism, misandry, prostitution, Wu Xing, the gods of America, Egypt, and China, reincarnation, the God of the Universe, Shakespeare, medieval independence, PUAs, bitches, MGTOWs, cattle ranching, mountain aesthetics, English grammar, strip clubs, city bar chains, poverty, wealth, the overarching grip of depression in America, Zhuge Liang, super powers, and (let’s not forget)… Nathan fucking Fillion.

(Also, Mr. Fillion, having not heard from you in quite a few months now and having contacted your personal Twitter account twice, I’ll go ahead and assume that you have no problem with your character’s lines as-is.  As always, you’re more than welcome to contact me via email or Twitter.)

So anyway, this was just a short update to let you know what (Universe willing) will be coming out later on this month.  And if any of you have self-published in the past and have had good experiences with an online printer (or have any other advice for a first-time author [after years of writing – crazy, right?!?]), feel free to leave a comment below.

Also, my blog’s website name is getting ready to run out of its paid time, and I’d hate to lose the name, so if any of you guys would like a free, signed copy of my new book later this month, please donate $30 (the only way I can be sure to get the $26 I need, after PayPal fees) with my button to the side.  You’ll be helping the site stay up another year, and be one of the first people to get a copy of my book.  ^_^

And now, for your Monday listening/viewing pleasure, the two songs/videos that I can’t get out of my head…

“God Wants You to Wear a Hat” – WKUK

“Pearl Harbor Sucked” – Team America: World Police

You’re welcome.

Posted in Comedic, Update, YouTube | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Respect goes up; Love comes down

I remember talking with my mom about this the other night, and thought it was a worthy enough topic to expound upon a bit.  Before I get into it too much, I have to reintroduce a concept that has been lost to the Western family unit: the Chain of Command.  Now, I take a much more benevolent stance on the chain of command than some people, but I still agree that it is a very important facet of family life.  As with the military, things go a helluva lot more smoothly once the whole unit knows what one person is in charge.  There aren’t two COs on a ship… there’s a CO and an XO.  There aren’t two Presidents of the US… there’s a President and a VP.  And in the family as well, there is one person in absolute charge, and that is the husband.  The wife is the VP, so to speak – she has much more “authority” than the kids, but no chance in hell of “vetoing” the husband’s directives.  That is how a proper family is run.

Once you understand the CoC (Chain of Command), it’s easier to also understand the literal roles of father, mother, and children within it.  Here is the lesson: “Respect goes up the CoC; Love comes down the CoC.”  The husband loves the wife and kids; the wife loves the kids.  The kids respect the mom and dad; the wife respects her husband.  It’s the natural order.  That’s why a man feels slighted in terms of affection when children enter the picture: it’s not that his wife loves him less, it’s that she’s discovered what actual love is.

Think about it… you love those for whom you do; you respect those who do for you.  It is appreciation and respect that raises the vagrants’ arms toward the free, hot bowls of soup – it is love and concern that causes the soup kitchen volunteer to ladle it out to them.  Think about a child who finds a bird with a broken wing… the bird cannot fend for itself, and has no choice but to respect the fact that the child could crush it with one strong grasp, or merely move it to a place the bird has no control over going.  The child is the one that decides to show compassion and tend to the bird, giving of his excess in order to help mend the bird’s wing and fill its poor, empty belly.  This was touched on a bit by the “No Ma’am” MGTOW blog here (which is also a decent read).

Now, before any ladies reading this take offense to this Truth, you have to understand that even the Bible (way back then!) understood this basic concept.  Men are instructed to love their wives (Colossians 3:19, Ephesians 5:25,28) and women are instructed to respect and submit to their husbands (Colossians 3:18, Ephesians 5:22, Titus 2:5, I Peter 3:1, 5-6).  Funny, right?  Every so often, such random nuggets of Truth found buried in the dark recesses of that Bronze Age tome really do surprise me.

Nevertheless, it is offensive to rebellious bitches whenever they find that they are (by nature) incapable of love for their men in relationships and are responsible for respecting/obeying/submitting to their partners.  The Western bitch is taught by Western society that she is capable of the opposite, and strives to topple the man from his rightful place in the home and relationship in order to prove it.  The Lady, on the other hand, humbly accepts her role in the relationship and home, accepting her Lord’s protection, provision, and – let’s face it – love for her, and repays him with the respect that he is rightly due.  The Lady knows that her place is not by his side, but under his caring gaze – that she is not meant to seek more work than to make the home a warm, inviting haven for the Lord and his children.  And honestly, what woman in her right mind would want to give that up merely so she can say that she too “wears the pants” in the family?  It’s lunacy – and it’s what Western society teaches our children from the very beginning.

Once you understand that “Respect goes up the CoC; Loves comes down the CoC,” you really begin to understand the proper dynamic between men and women – the one that doesn’t bother fighting against our Truest natures, but the one that generates peace and love in the home.  Everything else is just war and tense standoffs… and who wants that?!?

Posted in Agnostically Biblical, Instructional, Pensive | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

Why do people still use the word “homophobe”?

Just a quick thought I had (again) today that I’ve hit on in everyday conversation before – why is it that people in Western society still use the word “homophobe”?  And lest you mistake my meaning, I’m not saying that the term (or the type of people that inspire it) is outdated, but just etymologically incorrect.

I’m skipping over the fact that the “homo” part of the word means “the same” (and the obvious joke about the fear of twins – which is [oddly enough] tediously named “duomaieusiophobia”) and instead focusing on the “phobe” part.  That part is the root of “phobia”, which as we all (should) know has to do with fear.

Now, I want to hasten to point out that fear is abso-fucking-lutely nothing like hate.  They are two very different, unique emotions.  Yet, when someone uses the word “homophobe”, they most certainly mean someone who hates gay people.  Not only is that confusing, but it’s a dreadful misappropriation of the root words, which would be better voiced with other ones (if society weren’t so stupid – but more on that later).

Fear causes you to avoid the object thereof – avoidance to the point of actively fleeing from the cause if need be.  Hate, on the other hand, most often incites active engagement of the object – as can be seen in the many examples of violent “hate crimes”, many of which have been directed against gay people.

An example for the visually inclined:

Hate:

Bitches are the reasons that some Ladies aren't given the benefit of the doubt.

Bitches are the reasons that some Ladies aren’t given the benefit of the doubt.

.

.

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Fear:

Spiders are the reasons that men buy heavy boots - and often hurl them at the ceiling.

Spiders are the reasons that men buy heavy boots – and often hurl them at the ceiling.

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Do you understand now?  Good – glad we’re on the same page.

Now, I’d never offer a critique like this without a ready solution, and I came up with it quite some time ago.  The proper word would be “homomisanthrope” – one who hates all people that pair with the same sex, essentially.  Only hate gay men?  “Homomisandrist.”  Only hate gay women?  “Homomisogynist.”  Simple, simple stuff.

The only reason it’ll never catch on is that people… are… stupid (and lazy).  Hardly anyone makes the active effort to live Truthfully these days, so the people who speak incorrectly will just have to line up behind the Christians, the evolutionists, the atheists, the feminists, and the people who somehow think blogging from home will solve the world’s problems.

>_<

Posted in Instructional, Pensive | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

I’m DONE with secondary education.

This will be short, but this needed to be said…

I’m DONE with secondary education.  DONE.  And I don’t mean in the sense where people say, “I’ve finally graduated college/university and have gotten that shitty, useless piece of paper that everyone says you need to get in order to get one of the higher-level drone jobs!”

No… I mean I’m done with pretending that there’s a light at the end of that particular tunnel.  I know what’s at the end of that tunnel: massive student loan debts, a stalled job market, and a sinking economy.

I’m done taking my genius intellect into a classroom lorded over by some moron with a doctorate from Dumbfuck U. and pretending that that idiot is somehow my superior – like the jackass is qualified to “teach” me.  Oh, and I’m also done acting like I’m not bored to fucking tears by material which is common fucking sense!

My 2-year in Fine Arts will have to be my last expensive piece of paper, because I am DONE.  From here on out, I will work whatever job I can find in order to secure housing and basic needs… that’s it!

But more importantly… I will now rise or fall on MY WRITING (Which, by all accounts, is exemplary.) and will either make my fortune therewith or die trying.  So, readers, you may look for me in the news or in the obituaries, but from here on out, it will be one or the other.

Wish me luck.
I believe the Universe is with me on this one.

Posted in Rant, Update | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments