Trapped in a Poor Man’s Life

This will just be a quickie about my general position in the universe, as opposed to the grandiose things that run through my head…

I feel like I was born out of time – or at least out of station.  My dreams are so ridiculously big that it would take one of the world’s largest fortunes to accomplish them all.  And that’s no exaggeration!

Whilst ruminating on the last post I made about art (Yes, I ponder my own work sometimes.), I thought about how cool it would be to carve statues from marble.  I looked it up, ladies and gentlemen, and the materials involved are expensive!  Not exactly the kind of hobby one should be pursuing if one is a dilettante.

But it got me to thinking – all the things I would most like to do are rich hobbies!  For an idea of how out of sync my mind is with my wallet, here’s a list of some awesome things I can think of that I’d like to do (starting with the most recent first)…

1.  Carve epic statues from marble
2.  Build a castle out of black granite
3.  Forge my own medieval plate armor and weaponry
4.  Practice mid-gallop Japanese horseback archery (a la The Last Samurai)
5.  Grow an arbor of trees – carefully interwoven over the years so that they grow to interlock
6.  Build my own full-scale replica of the Globe theater, and then direct and star in Shakespearean performances there
7.  Travel to foreign countries not only to see World Wonders, but also stay long enough to learn the languages like a native
8.  Make my own clothing – from the picking of cotton, to weaving the fabric, to making/using the dyes, to designing and putting together the fabrics
9.  Learn to swordfight properly – everything from Fencing to Kendo and Iaido
10.  Grow, harvest, mill, and bake my own bread

I’m going to stop there, but trust me… that’s really just the tip of the iceberg.  You could ask anyone that knows me.  My only hope is that someday I’ll write a book that gets enough of a following behind it for me to actually be able to do any of that.  I haven’t given up, mind you, but I am old enough to know how difficult it would be to try these things so late in life.

About Emperor Lu Bu

The Emperor of Xeresgate - if you wish to know more, read my words.
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6 Responses to Trapped in a Poor Man’s Life

  1. caliwow says:

    Those are all great dreams/goals, but not only do you need the money, you’d also need a couple lifetimes haha

    • The most time consuming one (other than the trees) seems to be the castle one, but if Castle Magic (Google it.) can make a decent keep in 5 years, I figure that with enough help, I could erect a decent castle in 10-15… even if I use granite (which I definitely would want to do).

  2. lindaghill says:

    If you don’t dream big you’ll never know what you’re capable of

    • Technically, if I never have the money to try these things, I’ll never fully know what I’m capable of, but I get what you’re saying.

      Most people I know never dream beyond the “American dream”: husband/wife, kids, dog, paid-off house in the suburbs with a white picket fence. It’s really kind of depressing how shallow our imaginations have gotten in this age of unparalleled scientific advancement. 😦

  3. I want to make a car.
    Cure cancer
    Ride an ostrich
    Build a tree house
    And buy an island
    Or just have a house with a pool. That will do too

    • I want to have a car made – I suck with machinery. On the bright side, I know exactly what car I’d have made… the Ferrari P4/5 by Pininfarina. The original was a one-off custom job made from a Ferrari Enzo and custom seated/roll-caged for the owner and his son. I’d have them make it big enough for me. >:)

      My saliva cures cancer. I can prove it. No girl that’s ever kissed me has gotten cancer. In my cheating ex-wife’s case, that’s moderately unfortunate.

      I’ve fed an ostrich – is that close enough? If I went to ride one, I’d probably break its legs.

      I used to climb trees all the time when I was a kid. I would definitely be down with building a tree house, but it would have to be awesome – like the old Swiss Family Robinson one (or that one from the short-lived Crusoe).

      I also want to buy an island. I heard that Nicholas Cage did. I swear, that guy is made of awesome.

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