Happy Dragons Day!

In honor of the third annual Dragons Day (created by yours truly in response to probably the most dreaded and commercially suspect “holiday” of all time: V-Day [That’s right – it is disrespectful to say its full name on Dragons Day!]), I have come up with a handy list of 10 ways that Dragons Day is empirically better than V-Day.

So, don your Dragon gear, drink your Dragon shots, and happily read…

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10 ways Dragons Day is better than V-Day

  1. A Dragon – any Dragon – would kick the ever-lovin’ shit out of Cupid.
  2. On Dragons Day, you don’t buy overpriced candy for your annoying other, you sacrifice her ass to the Dragon and he finds you a new one.
  3. Dragons aren’t about poetry, they’re about badassery.
  4. The only way diamonds are brought up on Dragons Day is if you find one in his hoard.
  5. Picture a Dragon.  Did “commitment” pop into your head?  No?  Exactly.
  6. A Dragon would never make you feel badly for drinking to excess on his day.
  7. Dragons don’t eat in fancy restaurants.  In fact, if you’re eating somewhere that you can’t order an entire leg of something bigger than a chicken, it’s probably an insult.
  8. If you’re the kind of person that saves head for V-Day, then on Dragons Day, your head would be on a pike.
  9. V-Day?  Possibly one fat dancing girlfriend.  Dragons Day?  76 hot, busty strippers!
  10. No one gets you sappy sweaters or other shitty clothes for Dragons Day.  (Enjoy the new armor!)

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Can you think of any other ways Dragons Day is better than V-Day?  Leave them in the comments!

Happy Dragons Day, everybody!!

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About Emperor Lu Bu

The Emperor of Xeresgate - if you wish to know more, read my words.
This entry was posted in Comedic and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Happy Dragons Day!

  1. You know Cupid had lead arrows for hate. 🙂

  2. aodhfin1988 says:

    I like this trend. Why have I not heard of it before? From now on, it is Dragon’s Day for this dragon (minus the strippers, not really my thing). Keep it up, Lu Bu.

  3. Pingback: Happy Dragons Day! (II) | Show Me

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